A Year Without Shopping: What Emma Edwards Learned About Money, Confidence & Clothes

“I have nothing to wear.”
Sound familiar?

In this episode of Get Rich, Molly sits down with fan-favourite guest Emma Edwards (The Broke Generation) to unpack why so many of us overspend on clothes, still feel like we have nothing to wear, and how our wardrobes are deeply connected to confidence, identity and money.

Emma recently completed a full year without clothes shopping — no new, no second-hand, no rentals — an experiment that completely transformed her self-esteem, spending habits and style.

Together, Molly and Emma dive into:
✨ Why we keep buying clothes we don’t wear
✨ The $6,000 realisation: how much we actually spend
✨ The “fantasy self” hiding in your wardrobe
✨ What shopping has to do with body image
✨ How stopping shopping improved Emma’s confidence
✨ How to cut back on buying clothes without going cold-turkey
✨ Why we overspend on our kids’ wardrobes
✨ How to build a wardrobe you actually love

If you want to spend less, feel better in your clothes, and stop the endless “nothing to wear” spiral… this episode will change the way you shop forever.

🎙️ Emma’s New Book: The Wardrobe Project: A Year of Buying Less and Liking Yourself More
📚 Order it here

This episode is brought to you by InvestorKit, Australia’s #1 Buyers Agency for 2023 and 2024. They specialise in helping investors find high-growth properties utilising industry leading AI and data driven research process across Australia. 70%+ of the properties they purchase are off-market and they have consistently outperformed national average capital growth rates by over 49%. Whether you’re looking to build your property portfolio or secure your first investment. Check them out here.

CHAPTERS

00:00 – Welcome to Get Rich
01:16 – ‘Nothing to Wear’ & Today’s Guest
02:08 – A Year with No Clothes Shopping
03:26 – Post-Lockdown Identity & Shopping
04:59 – The $6k Wardrobe Wake-Up
06:15 – Early Triggers: Seasons, Social, Storefronts
07:32 – Events, Weddings & Re-wearing
08:59 – The Blue Dress That Changed Her Mind
10:19 – What’s Actually in Your Wardrobe?
12:04 – Confidence, Body Image & Seeing Yourself
14:12 – How Her Shopping Habits Transformed
15:34 – Loving Your Own Clothes Again
16:48 – Styling, Colours & Buying for Your Body
17:29 – Sell, Donate or Gift?
19:23 – When the Urge to Buy Hits
21:08 – Wardrobe Stories: Fantasy Self vs Reality
22:27 – The Little Black Dress Myth
23:29 – Partners, Friends & Outfit Repeating
24:44 – Community Wins & Pre-Loved Pride
26:43 – First Steps to Cut Back (Without Going Cold Turkey)
28:58 – Kids’ Clothes, Needs vs Wants
31:45 – The Wardrobe Project: Book & Launch Details

LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Her Money Matter Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/her-money-matters/id1820346389
Emma’s New Book - The Wardrobe Project: A Year of Buying Less and Liking Yourself More: Order it here

CONNECT WITH EMMA EDWARDS

Website: https://thebrokegeneration.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the.brokegeneration
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emma-edwards-04716727/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063523878940#

CONNECT WITH LADIES FINANCE CLUB

Join our free Facebook group - Ladies Finance Club Money Chat
Website: https://www.ladiesfinanceclub.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ladiesfinanceclub/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/ladies-finance-club/

TAKEAWAYS

• Emma's year without shopping was enlightening and transformative.
• Shopping often serves as a way to cope with identity issues.
• The emotional experience of shopping can overshadow financial considerations.
• Many people only wear 20% of their wardrobe 80% of the time.
• Clothing is deeply tied to self-image and confidence.
• Observing shopping habits can lead to greater self-awareness.
• It's important to challenge the belief that new clothes will solve problems.
• Friends and family can be inspired by mindful consumption practices.
• Children's clothing habits can reflect parental buying behaviors.
• Understanding the difference between wants and needs is crucial.

SOUND BITES

"A year without clothes shopping."
"I stopped seeing it as a solution."
"Nobody cares. Nobody notices."

TRANSCRIPT

[00:00:00] Molly: Welcome to Get Rich, the podcast that helps you do just that. Get rich and stay rich. Hey, I'm Molly Benjamin. I'm the founder of Ladies Finance Club, one of Australia's largest financial education platforms for women. But before I started helping thousands of women take control with their money, I was a hot financial mess when it came to my own finances and not the fun kind of hot, more like crying in a supermarket, wondering where all my money went kind of hot.

[00:00:29] But here's the thing, if I can go from financial mess to owning a share portfolio, investing in property, and building wealth. Then you can too. My mission is simple to make women rich because when we have financial freedom, we have choices, confidence, and control over our future. Every week on Get Rich, I sit down with some of the best experts in the industry to break down how we can all.

[00:00:53] Start investing, growing our money and creating long-term financial security without the jargon, boring bits or overwhelm. Because when women get rich, we don't just change our lives, we change the world. So if you're ready to start making some smart money moves, hit that subscribe button and let's get rich together.

[00:01:12] Other,

[00:01:16] if you have ever stood in front of the wardrobe bursting with clothes and thought. I have literally nothing to wear. This episode is gonna hit very close to home. It did for me recording it today on Get Rich. I'm welcoming back one of our all time favorite guests, Emma Edwards from The Broke Generation.

[00:01:32] So Emma's just released a brand new book called The Wardrobe Project, A Year of Buying Less and Liking Yourself more. And in it, she does something most of us can't imagine. She goes a full year with. Out clothes shopping, no new, no secondhand, no rentals, nothing. So I absolutely love this conversation and it really made me reflect on my own relationship with clothes.

[00:01:57] So it's definitely an eyeopener. So you have bought out a new book and it's all about how you stop buying clothes and started feeling enough. So you did a year without shopping.

[00:02:08] Emma: A year without clothes shopping. Yeah. Not new, not secondhand, not rented. Wow. Done. It was, it was, it was enlightening to say the least.

[00:02:17] Molly: Yes. So let's, I wanted dig into that a little bit more, especially from a self-confessed shopaholic. I mean, I'm getting better, but definitely had an issue with clothes back in the day. Mm-hmm. So why is it so hard to stop spending? And what were those first few weeks like when you decided to go a whole year without shopping?

[00:02:39] Emma: Yeah, I, I'll take you back a bit sort of further to the end of, um, it was the end of 2022. I started to think about this and it's funny, as I've been talking about the book and I've been talking about that pre period, I've been kind of reminding people that, you know, at that time, especially in Melbourne, we were only a deep breath clear from lockdown.

[00:02:57] Yeah. So it was, it was a strange time. Everything was very on. Certain we were kind of getting back into old routines, going back to jobs, going back to offices, you know, battling how our bodies have changed from being stuck inside for two years, and I'd found myself. Sort of treating those identity question marks with this sort of old habit that I'd had from a few years before of outsourcing my identity to shopping, to buying things.

[00:03:26] Yeah. And you know, I was feeling a certain kind of way about, you know, going back to. My job and getting back out, you know, in the world. Yeah. And I found that I was buying a lot of clothes to, I guess, try and feel confident I'd turned 30 in lockdown. I was trying to sort of reconcile this new version of myself that, you know, all those things that you say you want to do and B, and feel like by 30.

[00:03:48] And yeah, that just doesn't happen at the best of times. That alone in the middle of a pandemic. And so I started to think about, you know, is this really. Is this really where I wanted to be at? I'd obviously done so much work on my finances before and I'd written my first book Good With Money through that year, and there was just kind of this hole in specifically clothed spending that was different to the rest of my relationship with money because it was so deeply tied to my identity in the way that I saw myself and my body image and that kind of thing.

[00:04:16] So I started to think, oh, you know, that would be a fun challenge if I could go a year without buying because I knew that I would. In a literal sense, be able to do it because I knew that I had enough clothes to wear, even if I wore black trousers and a t-shirt every day. I knew I would physically be able to do it, but I knew that it would push me emotionally.

[00:04:35] And so I started to think about it for sort of that last three months of the year. And I thought, oh. Let's just give this a go. You know, I can post about it online. It might be interesting to other people. I wonder what I'll feel like. And more than anything else, I'd reviewed all of my spending at the end of the year, as I always do, and I sort of saw this line item that was sort of like that clothing or clothing adjacent category that was sitting around five and a half, $6,000.

[00:04:59] Mm. To be honest, it was less than I thought it was gonna be. I was like, oh, that's not that bad. You know, I can live with that. But I was thinking, what have I got? To show for that. If I have spent six grand and I loved my wardrobe, that's one thing.

[00:05:13] Molly: Yeah. But I didn't

[00:05:14] Emma: love my wardrobe and I was still tempted by everything.

[00:05:16] I always saw, you know, I was clicking somebody's affiliate link as soon as like, you know, the, you know those people that have the really good style online? And so I thought, well, you know, at originally kind of started off as a way to just cut that out of my spending. I thought, great, if I don't buy clothes, I'll have that much released back into my.

[00:05:33] Cash flow system. Yeah. But I didn't know at that point that it would be a much bigger emotional experience than a financial one. And so that's kind of how it turned into the whole wardrobe project and, and the book.

[00:05:46] Molly: Amazing. Wow. So many, so many things. I wanna deep dive on that, but I think as well, like for so many of us, like clothes is such a big part of our life.

[00:05:55] Mm-hmm.

[00:05:55] It's how we, you know, express ourselves and it's all these things. But I would definitely, in my earlier days, I would fall into the trap of. I've got a bit of extra income. I know I can afford it. It's not gonna matter too much, I'm just gonna buy it. But again, I would look at my wardrobe and I would still be like, I've got nothing to wear.

[00:06:15] Yeah. I have nothing to wear. And what's been interesting is I'm, as we currently record this, I'm 26 weeks pregnant, so I have. Like nothing fits me at the moment. So I've had to buy very minimalistic wardrobe. I've got a pair of gym tights, I've got like two tops, a few hand me downs. And I am amazed at how like I'm just like, yeah, that's fine.

[00:06:37] And I'll go into Westfield and I'm not even tempted number one 'cause I know everything probably doesn't fit. But I don't have this urge I used to have for the first time in my life to just wanna. Bye bye bye. It's been really interesting. So I guess when you think about your biggest triggers, or like when have you become like the most tempted, or what were those hardest moments for you when you did that year off?

[00:07:02] Was it sales? Was it social media? Was it events or like going to a, a wedding. What was that?

[00:07:09] Emma: Uh, there were a few key things. The first kind of speed bump I hit was the change of season. So it was sort of April-ish time. The first couple of months I was honestly kind of flying because. I had gone into it knowing that I was going to need to push myself a bit with my wardrobe and wear things more than just, you know, grabbing the first thing that you see or again, short cutting by buying a new outfit.

[00:07:34] Yeah, so I was flying the first couple of months because I was putting together new combinations. I was like, this is great. But then it got, the weather started to get a bit colder in March or April, and that was when I found myself looking outside of what I had. For signals of what to wear. Because you know that first day where you, you go, oh, I can't wear sandals with my outfit.

[00:07:57] Like Yeah, what are, what are shoes?

[00:08:00] Molly: Why don't I have any? Yeah,

[00:08:01] Emma: yeah. Like long sleeves, dunno. So, and this was the beauty of the year, because I was so removed from it, I wasn't actually in it. I could see myself doing everything that I would normally have done on autopilot. Yeah. And so I was finding myself being a little bit more triggered by.

[00:08:18] Things I would see on social media a bit more. I would dwell a bit more by a shop window. I would look at things that other people were wearing and be a bit like, Ooh. And that was where I was quite confronted by like, baby, you have nine months left of this like this, that, that little sprint at the beginning when you were putting new combos together, like there's gonna be a lot more that you're gonna push through.

[00:08:37] Yeah. So that was a big one. Going to, I had a wedding that I went to towards the end of the year actually. And that was really interesting because I wore a dress that was an absolute hallmark of many of my buying mistakes. I'd bought it because I'd seen it on somebody online. I bought it in the wrong color because the color she was wearing was out of stock, but I just had to have it, and so I bought it in blue.

[00:09:00] Yeah. And I didn't wear it that much because it didn't have the shape that I wanted. But I liked it in theory. This was a big pattern for me. I liked the idea of something. Yeah. I would often keep things that weren't perfect because I was almost grieving what I thought they were gonna be. Yeah. Which sounds insane, but it's, that's the way it is.

[00:09:19] But I wore that dress because I really had nothing else suitable for this wedding, and I got so many compliments on it. And I saw it completely differently by the end of the day, and now I'll happily pull it out of my wardrobe. So I was able to see all of these ways that we don't see things clearly. We see things completely differently to reality because clothing is so

[00:09:38] Molly: emotional.

[00:09:40] During that year, were you like, you kinda, you had that moment where you're like, oh, I didn't even like it. Why do I have it? But then obviously things changed, but did you kind of look at your wardrobe and kind of go, oh, I wish I'd bought. More quality pieces or God, I'm really over this stuff. Or were you kind of happy with what you already had?

[00:09:57] And it was just a matter of using it more. 'cause I think it's like the 80 20, we only wear 20% of our wardrobe.

[00:10:02] Emma: Yes. We were 20% of our wardrobe, 80% of the time. It was kind of an even split. And I realized when I was writing a book, I had to, I had to address at one point. I was like, I know it sounds at this point, like I hated all my clothes.

[00:10:13] I didn't, I really, everything sort of split into two camps. Things that I. Liked, but there was something a little bit not quite right about them. Yeah. 'cause I hadn't given it the respect.

[00:10:26] Molly: Yeah.

[00:10:26] Emma: And then there were pure sort of mistakes where I'd been buying into what I call my fantasy self. Or I'd bought something that really didn't fit and I thought, oh, you know, that'll be okay when I'm not on my period.

[00:10:37] And it's not, you know, you think, oh, drop three dress sizes next week when I'm ovulating. No, no, no. So it was kind of an even split. I was wearing everything, even if it was imperfect. But there was a real sense of, I really had that visibility over the things that weren't right. Mm-hmm. To see the patterns of things that weren't right.

[00:10:56] Yeah. Rather than just, oh, I hate that. I'll buy something new because it's, that makes so much sense. Right. When we feel like we have nothing to wear, it makes sense that buying something new will solve that. Yeah. But if we still feel like we have nothing to wear, then buying isn't the answer.

[00:11:09] Molly: Yeah. And

[00:11:10] Emma: so I had this visibility over the things I was.

[00:11:13] Continually repeating in a behavioral sense and the kind of ideals that I was buying into and where I wasn't really seeing my style for what it really could be. I think we're often sold this idea that style is just the right combination of items, but there's so much more underneath that, and having that whole year withdrawn from clothing consumption.

[00:11:35] I talk about it in the book a lot that it, it gave me a visibility to be able to actually see what I looked like in my clothes rather than being, I suppose, preoccupied with the idea of what I thought I looked like or what I was trying to look like. And that was really where things started to change.

[00:11:52] Molly: Okay. And I think that will probably, I've got a question I wanted to ask you on this as well, just around, yeah. I guess, how did your noby year change your confidence or your body image confidence?

[00:12:04] Emma: Yeah, it's something I honestly, that link, I didn't expect that at all. I sort of knew that the way I bought clothes was, you know, it was linked to my body image, but I didn't expect that not buying would.

[00:12:17] Improve that. I thought I might get better at tolerating the discomfort I, I sometimes had around my body. I didn't think that it would improve it by any stretch, but I think what it came down to, and I realized this sort of about three quarters of the way through the year, I kind of thought, hang on. I feel the best about the way that I look than I ever have.

[00:12:38] Mm-hmm. And I don't think that that can be a coincidence. And what I was doing with my outfits was I was taking a picture of everything I wore. So every time I liked an outfit, take a picture of it, put it in an album. On my phone is also a, a whole raft of apps you can use that help you log what you've worn and that kind of thing.

[00:12:54] I was just doing the photo and I think I was able to actually. See my reflection more than I ever had before. I think a lot of the time we use clothes to, rather than express ourselves, as we, as you know, fashion is designed for, we kind of use it to hide or to portray somebody that we are not. Yeah.

[00:13:14] Whereas by cutting off all of those external options of things I could try to look like, 'cause so much of my style experience had been trying to look like someone else or trying to emulate an aesthetic. By just the only kind of inspo I had was myself. It just kind of cut that cord between all of these possibilities that clothes promised that I could buy into.

[00:13:37] And so I stopped seeing it as a solution and I started seeing myself instead and realized actually when I'm not trying to be somebody else or where I'm not trying to live up to, you know, the ideal of the photo on the website, for example. Yeah. I can actually play with style in a totally different way.

[00:13:54] Molly: Mm.

[00:13:54] Emma: And that's where I really, you know, I didn't spend money on clothes that year, but that's where it completely became a much longer term benefit because it changed the way I buy forever.

[00:14:04] Molly: Yeah. So do you find yourself, well, I imagine you find yourself buying a lot less, but. How, I guess, has your shopping experience changed?

[00:14:11] Hmm.

[00:14:12] Emma: Well, through understanding the mistakes that I was making, I built out this sort of really strong understanding of what my style was, what my preferences were, and really quite granular things. So I, you know, I had the knowledge that I preferred a miniskirt over a miniskirt. But I didn't ever look at it with the granularity of what fabrics I liked or what shapes I liked or what lengths I liked.

[00:14:38] And so I really kind of, through playing with my whole wardrobe for a whole year with no other external input, I got a really strong understanding of. The type of shoulder that I like on a jacket or things that create the silhouette that I really love on me, with no other external input, not trying to be anybody else, not following any trends.

[00:14:57] Yeah, and so now I sort of talk about it in the book as like having much more of a respect for what I'm buying.

[00:15:02] Molly: Yeah. I'm not

[00:15:03] Emma: buying that quick hit, or I'm not buying based on my emotional experience on a certain day. I'm buying something to sort of curate an overall style and sense of style that I love.

[00:15:16] Yeah. And that I want to keep coming back to at the end of the year following the challenge year. So when I was buying, again, I had this realization where Summer came around again, I was like, oh my God, I can't wait to wear my clothes again. I am more interested in the clothes in my wardrobe than in shops.

[00:15:34] Molly: Yeah. And that

[00:15:35] Emma: had just never been something I'd experienced. I could always have been tempted buy something new, you know? Yeah. I could have always found you something that I wanted to buy.

[00:15:43] Molly: Yeah.

[00:15:43] Emma: Whereas now when events come around, I'm thinking, oh yes, I get to wear that dress again. Yeah. 'cause I've bought it in a way that, yeah.

[00:15:52] Is actually me and is something, it's a constant rather than these like random spikes of emotions, you know? Oh, I hated my thighs on that day, so I bought that, or I was really admiring that influencer then, so I bought that. But it really doesn't go with everything else I own. Yeah, it's a much more long term curative thing.

[00:16:11] Molly: Yeah, I think so much of what you're saying is gonna resonate with the audience 'cause it definitely is with me and I had a stylist when I was running my podcast in the uk I had a stylist on and she was talking about how they match your colors. They look at your body shape, it's about fewer things in your wardrobe.

[00:16:27] And I've actually got to the point now where after I, you know, have my baby, I actually wanna do a session with a stylist because even if it's gonna cost me a few thousand dollars, like. I wanna know what actually suits my body type and what suits my coloring. 'cause I just have a wardrobe full of clothes, which I don't really like.

[00:16:48] I mean, there's a lot of pink in there, a lot of pink suits, but half of the stuff, yeah, it does. It fit properly. Probably not. Like do I even like it anymore? Uh, did I buy it? 'cause it was a one-off event. And yeah, I think this is also just a good reminder of how much I just wanna get rid of. But I have this thing and, and I don't know if you came across this or you can help, I have quite a number of pieces of clothing that.

[00:17:12] I don't wanna give to an op shop because I'm like, I think there's value there. I think someone else would pay for it or buy it. But then when I put it up, they don't, am I just better off just like calling it, do you reckon? And just like getting rid of that or I don't know, going to it.

[00:17:29] Emma: Look, obviously it depends on the, the item and the amount in general.

[00:17:32] But I mean, look, the secondhand market in Australia is. It's not the same as it is in Europe, for example, because we have such high postage here. Like I know postage expensive everywhere, but especially in Australia, I think it makes so much cheaper in the uk. Yeah. Mm. So much cheaper and it's much more, yeah, normal.

[00:17:48] Like vintage is really popular over there and everything. One thing that I have in the last couple of years got a bit more, I guess, comfortable with is giving things away to people that. Would really get use out of them. Yeah. It's can be a bit more meaningful than just donating it when you don't even know if it's gonna make it out onto the shop floor.

[00:18:08] Although, I mean, when it does come to liquidating some of your wardrobe, if you do have things of value to give away. I did do, after the year, I did get a rack at one of those stores in Melbourne. We've called Racket Club and they're popping up everywhere. That was really interesting. I did, you know, I didn't have any expectations of what I was gonna get.

[00:18:26] I didn't have a whole lot of stuff to get rid of, but I had a few things that I'd Yeah. Knew that I wasn't going to wear or that didn't fit anymore. Yeah. And that was a really good way of kind of getting rid of things in one go. Yeah. Passing them on and making a bit of money from it. But without the labor, I suppose, of packaging everything up.

[00:18:43] Molly: Yeah, no, that's a great idea. I also like the idea of like giving things away to friends who I know will wear it. Like a girlfriend gifted me a denim jacket a few years ago and I love this denim jacket. I wear it all the time.

[00:18:55] Emma: Mm-hmm.

[00:18:55] Molly: And it saved me buying a denim jacket.

[00:18:58] Emma: Um, so yeah, I've been given two coats actually in the last couple of months, and they feel really special because they were given to me.

[00:19:04] Molly: Mm-hmm.

[00:19:05] Emma: And I love that.

[00:19:06] Molly: Yeah. So what advice do you have for women who might be perusing The shops probably don't be in the shop to start with, but they're perusing the shops and they're itching to buy something. Do you have like a go-to trick or like a hold up? Moment. Mm-hmm.

[00:19:23] Emma: Well, it's interesting you say that.

[00:19:24] Don't be in the shops. Something I actually did during the year when I wasn't buying was, was went to shops and browsed online and almost rehearsed the behavior of walking away, which sounds masochistic and maybe it is. But for me, how I was sort of looking at the year was I was an observer. I wanted to observe all of the patterns that I was stuck in, all of the things that I was doing on autopilot.

[00:19:50] And really, you know, what I do for a living is examine why we do the things we do. So I was really using myself as that test case, and it gave me a real understanding of the. Emotional rush that we get when we get that feeling that you're tempted to buy something. Yeah. And self-awareness in financial behavior.

[00:20:09] Well, self-awareness is one of the most empowering things that you can pursue in changing your financial behavior because you start to understand why you are drawn to that thing, the stories that your brain might be concocting about that thing. And you can really unpack the, the broader context of why you want to buy it.

[00:20:26] Often when we are in it, we're kind of like, well, I like it and I can afford it and it fits, so I'm gonna get it. Yeah. Or there's those justifications, I need it for this, I need it for that. Oh, I don't have enough of those. But when it's something that we are in a behavioral pattern of, sometimes it can be valuable to actually step back and observe what that is.

[00:20:44] So that would be, you know, if you're relating to the. The cycles of spending or if you find it hard to say no when you do see something you like. 'cause that was something I, I sort of had, I was all right if I didn't see things I liked, but if I liked it was game over. And that's kind of something that prompted the, the challenge, but kind of observing why it is that you want to buy things, but then also going into your own wardrobe and looking at the.

[00:21:08] Patterns and the stories that are hanging in there. I've got a whole sort of section in the book where I've broken down sort of common stories that hang in people's wardrobes. Yeah. Right. So it can be like old stories from old versions of yourself or old identities. It can be, yeah. You know, artifacts of insecurities.

[00:21:25] You know, my wardrobe at one time was just a museum of my insecurities. It was just everything I wanted to change about myself. I, I kind of had this concept of the fantasy self. You know, a lot of the time we are buying into, uh, either somebody that's our complete opposite or just a really elevated, unattainable version of ourselves.

[00:21:43] Yeah. And this happens a lot when we've had an identity change. So if we've become a parent or if we've got older and we've still got old, you know, pieces in our wardrobe, or if we've always had insecurities, you know, a lot of women chase that kind of polished put together. Look, everybody wants to look like that.

[00:22:00] Yeah. Um, but for most people's lifestyles and budgets, it's just not attainable. And so. Yeah, it's really getting curious about your buying process and also the things that you already own and kind of untangling the emotions that are, that are in there.

[00:22:14] Molly: Oh, that's brought up so much. 'cause I was, um, I just parted recently with a little black dress, which I think when you read the magazines in your twenties, like you were convinced there's gonna be so many occasions where you need a little black dress.

[00:22:27] I wore this little black dress twice 'cause I just didn't go to any occasions where it were quite a little black dress. Mm. But it was so funny because like I, and I, I think back now, why did I not wanna part with that? Because at the time I bought it in my twenties, it was a lot of money and I, I didn't, I wasn't earning a lot, so it was like this piece of value in my wardrobe.

[00:22:47] But yeah, like I just never, ever wore it. So it's, yeah, it's, and there's a few other things now I, I just need to go through my water now and look at it and be like, okay. No, this is, it served me once but no longer because I feel like we just have so much stuff in our lives as well, and I just wanna like live a more minimalistic life.

[00:23:06] And I know when I moved back from London, I could only bring like a box of clothes with me and so I had to cu and I would bring out stuff and my sister would be like, that made the cut back from London. Okay. I'd be like, oh, do you not like it? I think this is cool. So just on my final three questions, what I'm curious all to know is like, what did your friends and partner think?

[00:23:29] I mean, I think gone are the days where we meet our girlfriends to go shopping. Like we have more interesting things in our lives now. But what did your friends and partners think? Were they kind of inspired it by it to do try it themselves? Or were they like, oh, Emma's back in that. Red shirt again. Like what did they, like, what did they say?

[00:23:50] Emma: Yeah. It's funny. Um, and on, on that kind of clutter piece, just that you mentioned before, I talk a bit in the book about how when we feel cluttered in our wardrobes in our lives, often that can be a motivator to shop because shopping is this, this shortcut, it's simple. The outfits are there, the merchandise, they're iron, they're clean, they're ready to go.

[00:24:07] They're in the context of, of things that make you feel good, that make you feel inspired. And so. Often, you know, I, I run an accountability program with other women that are detaching from their consumption cycles as well. And something that we talk about a lot is, do you need to buy clothes or do you just need to do a load of laundry?

[00:24:23] Yeah. Because when the laundry piles up and what you wanna wear is just buried and it's unwearable 'cause it's not clean. That's when we're gonna reach for that shortcut in terms of what friends and my partner thought, well, my husband actually inadvertently did the year as well. Yeah. Because he wasn't even, he wasn't trying to, and you know, men have a different relationship with clothes on, on the whole Yeah.

[00:24:44] But, um, yeah, because we weren't. Popping out to go and look at that dress I saw on Country Road or, or they haven't got it online. I'm gonna go and see if they've got it in store and then he's having a look as well. He made it through the year. He made it even longer than me. Actually. He didn't buy anything until, I think, must've been, I bought something in early Feb of the year after.

[00:25:03] I think he bought something in March. Friends were really inspired by it as well. Again, with the whole outfit, repeater thing, you know, we've been conditioned to think that wearing the same thing over and over again is, is bad. Nobody notices.

[00:25:14] Molly: Nobody notices. That's like literally. Unfortunately, people don't think about as ourselves as much as we think about ourselves.

[00:25:21] Like, no, they don't care.

[00:25:23] Emma: They don't, people dunno what they had for dinner yesterday. They dunno what you wore last time. But what's interesting is I did get a lot of messages from people, or when we would go to events, people would be like, I've had this for five years, and they'd be so excited to tell me that they were wearing it again.

[00:25:36] Or like, oh, I'm going to a wedding on the weekend. Normally I would buy a dress, but, oh, I thought of you and you've inspired me. So it really does bleed out into other areas. And when you make it something. That everybody can get involved with. Yeah. You know, it can be, we can enable each other sometimes.

[00:25:53] And like I'm the biggest enabler, like if you are buying something, like I wanna see it, I wanna be involved, I wanna live vicariously through you. But sometimes when you kind of all agree to wear something you've bought before, it can be quite fun. And it can be like a group experience, just like shopping in the old days used to be.

[00:26:09] Molly: Oh my gosh, I love that. And I would love to know like how much like in total, like you have saved people without even realizing. I reckon it would be like. A hundred thousand plus of people just not buying extra things. They're like, yeah, I'm gonna show. Emma's gonna be so proud. And I love when people send that to you and they'll be like, you'll be so proud.

[00:26:26] You're like, I don't actually, I've never met this person, but I am

[00:26:29] Emma: Well done. Yeah. I am so proud. I love it.

[00:26:32] Molly: Okay, so practical first step when someone's like, okay, I'm gonna cut back, but I'm not ready to go cold Turkey. I'm not ready to do the year. But they're just like, I'm gonna cut back. Where do we start?

[00:26:43] Do we start, is it with our shopping habits? Is it with our current wardrobe? Is it culling? Like what's a good first step?

[00:26:49] Emma: Yeah, I think that, you know, often when you are trying to change your shopping habits and you know, you are either looking at doing a whole long period of not buying or as you say, you're not ready to go cold Turkey, what we often focus on is that buying part.

[00:27:04] But really, I often tell people to set to when they're changing, um, their behavior and setting goals and stuff. Focus on what you will do, not what you won't do. So like, okay, you're gonna buy less. You're not gonna buy at certain times. But what will you do instead? What are you gonna need to do to stop doing that?

[00:27:18] Well, you're gonna need to like your wardrobe more. You're gonna want to, you are gonna need to find a way to not want to shop as much. So you might have those boundaries around. You know that maybe you're only gonna buy five items for six months, or you're gonna set a certain limit, one item a month, a certain day of the month that you can buy on, but inside your wardrobe.

[00:27:37] Set yourself mini challenges in there. Wear the things that you are not wearing, even just to experiment. Um, you don't have to wear it and love it, but if you don't like it, work out why you don't like it so that you don't keep buying that same thing over and over again. Challenge yourself to wear a different outfit every day or every, you know, even just once a week, people often get stuck in the loop of, oh, I work from home, so I never really wear my clothes.

[00:27:59] And then I feel really uninspired. Yeah, just one day a week, put an outfit together. You know, I realize this a lot during the challenge. It's actually a lot more effort to. Create the looks that we want, then we think, and so then we think we've got nothing to wear because we are trying to do it within two seconds.

[00:28:15] But it actually takes some thought and some practice and some experimentation. 'cause we are not all stylists.

[00:28:20] Molly: Yeah. And

[00:28:21] Emma: that really, when you find that sense of. Dare I say, abundance in your existing wardrobe, that's going to quell the feeling that you have, that has you believing that you have nothing to wear and therefore need to buy something because you're gonna feel that you have enough.

[00:28:37] And gradually you'll get much more used to feeling that within your wardrobe. And so that sense of lack can be overcome. And if nothing else, you know, in some cases there is an objective lack of the right things to wear. But again, as I said, if you are. Often buying more things and you still feel like you have nothing to wear, then we're buying the wrong things, or we are buying with the wrong intentions.

[00:28:58] So even if you accept that look, there is an objective lag. But before I run that, run out like a bull in a China shop and buy a bunch of things, I'm gonna. Treat my wardrobe as a learning experience. I'm gonna understand what I have, I'm gonna understand why it's not working.

[00:29:12] Molly: Yeah. And then

[00:29:13] Emma: I can go out informed.

[00:29:15] 'cause that's sort of the other difference I'm buying with a different set of emotions and it's much, it's a much less emotionally flooded experience, but it's also a much more informed strategic experience. Yeah. Because there's so much out there. We've got so much to sort through, so much, it's just endless possibility.

[00:29:30] Yeah. So if we don't decide that we have enough. We can't buy our way to having enough. Yeah. You know, that trap of Oh, I'll get these and then I'm done. Yeah. You can't buy your way to being done. You have to decide that you're done ex like outside of that.

[00:29:44] Molly: Oh, so good. And then my final question, 'cause obviously we have, um, a lot of mothers who listen as well and they have kids and they.

[00:29:53] Overbuy for their kids. So I guess they can do a similar experiment as well. I know as well when we've had women on in the past or or coaching clients who've wanted to buy lots of clothes for their kids, it's because they didn't get them when they were kids, and so they want their kids to have a different experience.

[00:30:11] But can this be applied to our children?

[00:30:14] Emma: Yeah. A lot of women actually tell me that they sort of transfer their own buying habits onto their children when they have children. I mean, that's skewing into, I guess, money, beliefs and money behavior, which is obviously sitting underneath the wardrobe stuff.

[00:30:27] Yeah. But in less of like a style way, I suppose. Yeah, it definitely can be done with children. Obviously you've got a battle with kids that objective need that they do grow out of things really quickly, which is how that cycle starts. You know, you can't be like, no clue, it's for you 'cause nothing's gonna fit.

[00:30:43] Um, but I think again, it's that understanding of why you buying, where you are buying beyond the need, maybe where you are blurring the lines of want and need and using that justification like justification is just our brain telling stories to get the behavior to fit. Our set of beliefs. Mm-hmm. And so, yeah.

[00:31:01] When you are trying to change those habits, really looking at the emotions that you're feeling when you're buying those things, where can you put some parameters around that to, to separate what is a want and what is a need or maybe what is that excess? Looking at how much you're spending, seeing what the other possibilities are for that money.

[00:31:17] What are you taking away from yourself? And probably challenging the belief that you need to buy those things in order to provide for your child in the way that you want to. When there is that wound there of, I didn't have it, so I'm giving it to them.

[00:31:30] Molly: Yeah.

[00:31:31] Emma: That's one of those kind of belief things that's gonna drive that behavior.

[00:31:34] So if we challenge that belief mm-hmm. That's what you need to do. That behavior has to happen for you to get the outcome that you want, that's when we can kind of break that down and you can separate those things a bit more.

[00:31:45] Molly: Yeah. Oh, I love that. A lovely note to finish the podcast on. Emma, can you just repeat the title of your book and where we can buy it from?

[00:31:53] Emma: Yes, the book is called The Wardrobe Project, A Year of Buying Less and Liking Yourself More. It releases on November 26th so you can get it at all major retailers and online. And if you are in Sydney or Melbourne, we're having a couple of launch events. Sydney on the 27th of November, Thursday. That's at Dimick, Sydney and in Melbourne.

[00:32:12] We are having it at just co on the top of Emporium on Thursday, the 4th of December. So tickets will be available on the books, social media and mine, which is uh, the wardrobe project book on Instagram or on my own account, the dot broke generation.

[00:32:29] Molly: I love that. And if you would like to support Emma as well, people don't actually know this, but a lot of like how well a book does is about pre-sale.

[00:32:36] So actually pre-order Emma's book, if you're gonna buy it anywhere, just pre-order it, it helps the authors out. So there's a little fun fact for me.

[00:32:44] Emma: It makes a huge difference. It proves to book sellers that there's interest in your book. So. They stock it, which is not a given. Who knew? Getting your book stocked is not something you get handed to

[00:32:55] Molly: on the books.

[00:32:56] Another whole episode on that one. Another time.

[00:32:58] Emma: Yes.

[00:33:00] Molly: Thanks so much Emma. Thanks so much for having me.

KEYWORDS

clothing, shopping, wardrobe, body image, confidence, emotional spending, minimalism, sustainable fashion, self-awareness, personal finance